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If President Obama Tweeted Like President Trump

If President Obama Tweeted Like President Trump

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"AND "THE NEW YORK TIMES" IS NOT THE ONLY MEDIA OUTLET TRUMP IS MAD AT. YESTERDAY, I TOLD YOU THAT "THE WASHINGTON POST" DISCOVERED THAT A "TIME" MAGAZINE WITH TRUMP ON LOT OF TRUMP'S RESORTS IS FAKE. COME ON, MR. PRESIDENT. YOU CAN DO BETTER THAN THAT. IF YOU'RE GOING TO FAKE A MAGAZINE COVER, PUT YOURSELF ON THE COVER OF "O." LIVING HIS BEST LIFE. RADIANT. SO, THIS MORNING, TRUMP FIRED BACK: "THE

#AMAZONWASHINGTONPOST, SOMETIMES REFERRED TO AS THE GUARDIAN OF AMAZON NOT PAYING INTERNET TAXES-- WHICH THEY SHOULD-- IS FAKE NEWS!" FIRST OF ALL, THAT'S A FAKE TWEET. ( LAUGHTER ) AMAZON DOES PAY TAXES. THEY COLLECT SALES TAX, AND THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS "INTERNET TAXES." SECOND, MR. TRUMP, WE KNOW YOU THINK "THE WASHINGTON POST" IS FAKE NEWS. YOU DON'T HAVE TO KEEP TELLING US. I MEAN, OBAMA DIDN'T WAKE UP EVERY MORNING AND TWEET: "STILL FIRST

BLACK PRESIDENT. #IAMTHEDREAM!" ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) DIDN'T DO IT. DIDN'T HAVE TO. DIDN'T HAVE TO. OH, HEY, THIS IS IMPORTANT. I SHOULD HAVE SAID THIS AT THE BEGINNING OF THE MONOLOGUE. IF YOU'RE WATCHING THIS ON YOUR COMPUTER LATER YOU'RE GOING TO WANT TO HOSE THAT THING OUT. IF YOU HAVEN'T HEARD, THERE'S BEEN ANOTHER GLOBAL CYBER ATTACK. THIS TIME, HACKERS UNLEASHED A VIRUS CALLED GOLDENEYE, WHICH YOU MAY REMEMBER AS THE NAME OF PIERCE BROSNAN'S

FIRST JAMES BOND FILM. WHICH MEANS IT'S A PRETTY GOOD VIRUS, BUT YOUR DAD STILL THINKS SEAN CONNERY'S MALWARE WAS BETTER. ( APPLAUSE ) WE MISS YOU, SEAN. HE'S ALIVE, RIGHT? HE'S ALIVE. OKAY. GOLDENEYE IS RANSOMWARE, WHICH IS A KIND OF SOFTWARE THAT LOCKS UP YOUR COMPUTER UNTIL YOU PAY A RANSOM TO THE HACKER. THE VIRUS STARTED IN UKRAINE, WHERE IT HIT BANKS, CASH MACHINES, GAS STATIONS, AND SUPERMARKETS. IT WAS AN UNPRECEDENTED ASSAULT ON UKRAINIAN

TO-DO LISTS, AND IT ( LAUGHTER ) -- IT WASN'T JUST ERRANDS THAT WERE AFFECTED. THE VIRUS HIT THE RADIATION MONITORING AT CHERNOBYL, FORCING IT INTO MANUAL OPERATION. THE MANUAL BACKUP, OF COURSE, IS A GUY RUNNING UP AND DOWN THE HALLWAYS SCREAMING, "OH, GOD, WHY DID I TAKE THE JOB AS I.T. GUY AT CHERNOBYL?" "WHY DIDN'T I GO TO LAW SCHOOL OR IMPROV COMEDY?" ( APPLAUSE ) SO-- SO LITTLE APPLAUSE FOR CHERNOBYL

THESE DAYS. ( LAUGHTER ) THIS ATTACK EVEN MADE IT DOWN UNDER, ACCORDING TO AUSTRALIA'S MINISTER OF CYBER SECURITY. >> I CAN CONFIRM THAT THERE HAS BEEN TWO AUSTRALIAN COMPANIES WHICH HAVE BEEN IMPACTED BY RANSOMWARE OVERNIGHT. >> Stephen ( USING STRONG AUSTRALIAN ACCENT ): "NOW, TO MAKE SURE ME LAPPY'S NOT CHOCKERS WITH BUGS, I'M GONNA BASH DOWN TO THE APPLE STORE AND THROW IT ON THE GENIUS BARBIE!" ( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE

) THAT'S NOT A VIRUS. DINGOS HACKED ME LAPTOP. NOW, DON'T THINK YOU'RE SAFE, FOLKS, BECAUSE THE VIRUS HAS ALREADY SPREAD TO AMERICA, WHERE COMPANIES SUCH AS THE DRUG MAKER MERCK, AS WELL AS OREO AND NABISCO. NO! OUR PRESIDENTIAL ELECTIONS ARE ONE THING, BUT HOW DARE YOU HACK OUR DRUGS AND OUR COOKIES? THAT'S HOW WE COPE WITH THE RESULTS OF OUR PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION, OKAY? DOUBLE-STUFFED XANAX. ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

See more here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1v6ySvh6jEk

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If President Obama Tweeted Like President Trump""AND "THE NEW YORK TIMES" IS NOT THE ONLY MEDIA OUTLET TRUMP IS MAD AT. YESTERDAY, I TOLD YOU THAT "THE WASHINGTON POST" DISCOVERED THAT A "TIME" MAGAZINE WITH TRUMP ON LOT OF TRUMP'S RESORTS IS FAKE. COME ON, MR. PRESIDENT. YOU CAN DO BETTER THAN THAT. IF YOU'RE GOING TO FAKE A MAGAZINE COVER, PUT YOURSELF ON THE COVER OF "O."...